Thursday, February 7, 2008

Today Might Just Be One Of Those Days To Be Called A Right-Wing Conservative!

Today's one of those days when we show you what Discovering Insanity is all about. So, check out these wonderful stories about some of the most intersting people in our world and the things they do! A Florida woman pulled over when a deputy saw her run a red light had a case of beer belted in her front seat, but a young child unrestrained in the back, according to the arrest report. The deputy who pulled over Tina Williams Sunday reported smelling a strong odor of alcohol coming from the car. When he asked Williams for a driver's license, she replied, "I've never had one." According to the police report, a 24-pack of beer in the front passenger seat of her car was restrained by a seat belt but a 16-month-old girl was not in a child seat or safety belt. A deputy also found two metal pipes commonly used to smoke drugs in her purse. Police said Williams had bloodshot and watery eyes and staggered when she got out of the vehicle. Asked if she'd been drinking, she told the deputy, "I had a few." It was not clear if Tedrick would face any charges, but the child was released to her care, according to The Florida Times-Union. Say what?

A sex shop in Brasov, Transylvania, was fined more than $1200 and ordered to provide the man, said to be in his 40s, with a new doll. The man had also complained that the rubber doll deflated too quickly, local media said. A sex shop in Romania was fined £600 after a customer complained that an inflatable doll it sold him had lost its moan. The shop in Brasov, Transylvania (which is a real place, even though it sounds like a pun on the phrase 'bras off') was also ordered to give the man, in his 40s, a new rubber doll. He had also complained his doll deflated too quickly. Iulian Mara, of the consumer protection office, said: 'We went to the sex shop and found out he was justified.' And he complained because the inflatable doll went down on him??

OK folks, you figure out this one but it's a bit sickening. A Minneapolis man has been sentenced to five years of probation after police say he robbed a woman of her keys and cell phone then took off her shoes and licked her toes. Carlton Davis, 26, was sentenced to probation and evaluation for the next five years. According to the sentence, if Davis doesn't complete probation he will have to serve 21 months in prison. According to the criminal complaint, Davis approached a woman who was leaving work and said to her, in a very demanding voice, "put your cell phone and purse inside the bag". The complaint said that the 24-year-old woman was frightened so she complied. After giving Davis her belongings he demanded she take her shoes off. She did and Davis responded "Now I'm going to suck your feet". The victim told police that she was too shocked and scared to do anything. Davis then tried to suck her neck but as he approached her some people walked by and he took off. Just look at this guys mug shot. Doesn't he just look wacky? Maybe this guy needs one of those dolls in the previous story or a job at Payless Shoes!

And finally, this story has me a bit nervous. In a study of 361 men seen at their infertility clinic, researchers at the Cleveland Clinic found an association between the patients' cell phone use and their sperm quality. On average, the more hours the men spent on their cell phones each day, the lower their sperm count and the greater their percentage of abnormal sperm. The findings, published in the journal Fertility and Sterility, add to questions about the potential health effects of cell phones and other wireless devices. However, the new findings do not prove that cell phones somehow damage sperm, according to the researchers. "Our results show a strong association of cell phone use with decreased semen quality. However, they do not prove a cause-and- effect relationship," lead researcher Dr. Ashok Agarwal told Reuters Health. "We infer from our results that heavy cell phone use ... is associated with a lower semen quality." Agarwal said this study is more rigorously designed and will account for certain other factors like lifestyle habits (was chronic masterbation one of them?) and occupational exposures (walking through the mall on a hot summer day?) that might affect sperm quality. And my big question, just how do they measure the quality? Taste testing?

So there you go. A few happy and bizarre stories from our wacky insane world. I think I'm pretty much in the conservative McCain camp if this is what the liberal Hillary camp is up to these days. I'm wondering if the love doll guy realized it had a patch kit? Might have saved a little embarassment! Of course, that's just my opinion, I could be wrong!