Wednesday, February 28, 2007

The Reality of the Iraq War:
Documentary on Injured Soldiers Wakes Me Up!

This blog entry is in honor of my Dad. He served in WWII and although he never encountered battle on the front line, he had a special heart and empathy for the people who served in all branches of our military. So please sit back and read this'll wake you up.

Last night, I watched the ABC News special title Bob Woodruff: To Iraq and Back. It made me see a side of this war that I never really saw before. Every day we hear things like "10 Soliders Killed in Helicopter Crash" or "3 Dead in Troop Carrier Blast." Yes, this is a sad reality of the war, but these boys come home, we honor them, we bury them and yes, we forget about them.

The really sad part that we don't see because the media deems it too traumatic to show are those troops who return injured and must try to fit back into society...a society that does not want to hear about all of the medical problems these kids have incurred. For some, the care will last a lifetime. Bob Woodruff really brought that point home to me and the people I was watching it with last night. The shock may have been surprising, but it made me wake up.

Woodruff was there and although he wasn't a soldier, he experience the pain and suffering that each soldier AND their families goes through. The story of Bob Woodruff and his recovery is remarkable. On January 29, 2006, ABC News Anchor Bob Woodruff was severely injured in Iraq when his convoy was hit by a roadside bomb. Woodruff, who was wounded along with cameraman Doug Vogt, sustained multiple life-threatening injuries, including a devastating brain injury. In his first on-air reporting since the incident, Woodruff tells the incredible story of his life-altering injury and miraculous recovery.

In this one-hour special, Woodruff returns to the field to report the stories of brave young soldiers and Marines who, like him, are recovering from traumatic brain injury – the signature injury of the war in Iraq. Woodruff takes a closer look at the challenges they and their families face as they struggle not only to heal from their wounds, but to get the care they deserve.

Often called the signature wound of the Iraq war, TBI can rob people of themselves, causing problems that range from trouble speaking and concentrating to violence, anger and a loss of "filter". Bob's family established the Bob Woodruff Family Fund for Traumatic Brain Injury to raise awareness about TBI, and to raise money to support organizations that help those suffering from TBI to receive the best care possible.

According to a July 2006 report from the Veterans Administration inspector general, brain injured veterans often fall through the cracks. It found that "multiple factors lead to suboptimal access to care" and "services are often very limited in communities where injured veterans live."

According to the Department of Defense, there have been about 23,000 nonfatal battlefield casualties in Iraq and Afghanistan. But through an internal VA report, Woodruff discovered that there are more than 200,000 veterans who have sought out the VA for care.

"What you have are two sets of books," says Paul Sullivan, who served in the first Gulf War and is now an advocate for Veterans. "The Department of Defense saying that there's 23,000 wounded from the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan, but the Department of Veterans' Affairs is actually treating 205,000 veterans from these two wars."

The force from an IED or roadside bomb can rattle the brain so severely inside the skull that it can cause life long health problems.

His situation brings to light that many more soldiers serving in Iraq or having returned from battle, may be walking around with a traumatic brain injury and not even know it. That could mean of the 1.5 million Americans, who have served or are now serving, more than 150,000 people could have a brain injury that is unrecognized by the Department of Defense.

Bob Woodruff suffered a painstakingly slow recovery, through intensive speech and cognitive therapy, reading, writing, and forcing his brain to accomplish simple tasks he had previously taken for granted. As he healed, he became determined to help shed light on traumatic brain injury (TBI), to make something good come out of such a tragic experience for him and his family.

Let's look at the reality of this war. It's not just the kids who die...that's sad enough. What got me is how we, as Americans, don't get off our asses and help these boys and girls out. They went over there to protect our freedom and yet we really don't know much about them.

Bob Woodruff and his family have started a foundation called the Bob Woodruff Family Fund for Traumatic Brain Injury (Click on that link there in bold to learn more!) to raise money and assist members of the military with cognitive rehabilitation and other care needs following traumatic brain injury suffered in service to their country. Check Out this foundation and may drop them a couple of'll feel better for doing so.

Finally, you need to see this documentary. ABC News will be putting this online tomorrow morning for all to see. If you get the chance, watch it. It will be well worth the time you take. To see it, click here ->

And by the way, make my Dad proud!

Tuesday, February 27, 2007

The Trunk Monkey: The Ultimate Car Security System and Internet Cult Phenomenon

According to the National Insurance Crime Bureau, a car is stolen every 25.5 seconds in the United States. In 2004 a total of 1,237,114 motor vehicles were reported stolen. If you own a 1995 Honda Civic, you might want to invest in an anti-theft system because that is the most-stolen car.

Are you paranoid? Don't be. Suburban Auto Group in Sandy, Oregon has a highly effective security system for your ride. They call it the Trunk Monkey.

Consisting solely of a trained monkey and a steady source of ice cold high-quality import ale or lager, the Trunkmonkey lives in the trunk of any vehicle and is car security at its best. The moment your car is in danger, the Trunk Monkey jumps into action. This series of commercials has become an internet cult phenomenon.

Kids throwing eggs at your car? The Trunk Monkey will chase them down and make them clean up the damage. Car thief hotwiring your new beauty? The Trunk Monkey emerges from the trunk, beats the culprit and then disposes of the evidence. The Trunk Monkey will even deliver your baby in the backseat. How's that for helpful?

Reaction to the commercials, which were created and produced by Portland’s R-West advertising agency, was overwhelmingly positive on Portland-area blogs. A search for “trunk monkey” on Google’s blog search turned up 1,689 results. The two newest commercials, the Super Bowl episode and the “Trunk Monkey fights aliens” installment, already have more than 5,000 views on YouTube.

“Everyone here at Suburban is every excited,” said General Manager Erinn Sowle. “We didn’t realize how big (the monkey) was until we went to the Portland Auto Show last month. It made the Super Bowl that much better.”

I didn't have a lot to write about today. I'm still coming off the disappointment that the Oscar's are over and now have to resort to Entertainment Tonight and Inside Edition to find out all of the just oh so exciting news on my favorite celebrities. Yeah, right.

So take a break from your hectic day and Click Here To View All the Trunk Monkey Commercials. You'll get a good laugh and I hope your have a great day!

Monday, February 26, 2007

Want to Lose Weight Fast?
Send Me $153 And Find Out How!

"When is a diet pill worth $153 a bottle?" asks one of the most popular TV infomercials of the past year.

Certainly not when it's Leptoprin.

Dramatic, unsubstantiated weight and fat loss claims continue to tempt the overweight with new hope for a quick fix. If you read the very small fine-print during these ads, you’ll see “Results not typical.” Hmm.

I’ve seen this commercial so much that I can’t even quote Melissa Pace (The Hostess). Now that is pathetic. So, I decided to do a little research on this “amazing diet drug” and did a Google search.

Wickipedia’s entry in my Google search results looked like this:

Leptoprin - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Leptoprin/Leptopril is a weight-loss pill marketed by Generics Labs. ... Whoever last edited the Leptoprin page here on Wikipedia had erased everything and ... - 15k - Cached - Similar pages

I thought it quite interesting that on the search result for Wickipedia it said, “Whoever last edited the Leptoprin page here on Wikipedia had erased everything and ...” So, I decided to dig deeper and find out more about this drug, the company and the FTC action.

So here’s what the product is: The name Leptoprin may sound like leptin, a protein the body makes to control fat stores. Leptoprin is an herbal supplement marketed by "A.G. Waterhouse", a front for Basic Research of Salt Lake City, Utah. It was formerly known as Anorex. Despite the pharmaceutical-sounding name, the company that makes Leptoprin (and Leptopril) is not a pharmaceutical company.

The method of advertising the product is unique, and begins with the question "When is a diet pill worth $153 a bottle?" The ad goes on to claim that Leptoprin is "developed for the significantly overweight", that it is "much too powerful" for the "casual dieter".

There is also a less expensive "generic" version of the formulation called Leptopril, which is advertised as being developed by "Generix Labs". The two products are in fact exactly the same, being marketed to two different consumer personalities by the same company.

"Clinical studies don't lie," says the Web site of Leptoprin's manufacturer, A.G. Waterhouse, one of several related Utah companies that hawk dubious supplements on TV and online.

"In a recent clinical trial, subjects who were given the active Leptoprin-SF compound (in conjunction with modest caloric restriction and exercise) experienced eleven times (1100%) more weight loss and 63 percent more fat loss than those on diet and exercise alone."

In fact, the six overweight subjects lost no more weight or body fat after six weeks on Leptoprin's active ingredients than 14 others who were given either a placebo or nothing at all.

The Federal Trade Commission has come after this company for deceptive practices. In fact, The Commission’s complaint names: Basic Research, L.L.C.; A.G. Waterhouse, L.L.C.; Klein-Becker usa, L.L.C.; Nutrasport, L.L.C.; Sovage Dermalogic Laboratories, L.L.C.; BAN, L.L.C.; Dennis Gay; Daniel B. Mowrey, Ph.D., also doing business as American Phytotheraphy Research Laboratory; and Mitchell K. Friedlander, all operating from the same Salt Lake City facility. Hmmmm.

Here are a few highlights from the FTC’s brief against the makers of this super popular diet drug.

[Federal Register: May 18, 2006 (Volume 71, Number 96)]
[Page 28865-28867]
From the Federal Register Online via GPO Access []

[Docket No. 9318]

Basic Research LLC, et al.; Analysis of Agreement Containing
Consent Order To Aid Public Comment

AGENCY: Federal Trade Commission.

ACTION: Proposed consent agreement.


SUMMARY: The consent agreement in this matter settles alleged violations of Federal law prohibiting unfair or deceptive acts or
practices or unfair methods of competition. The attached Analysis to Aid Public Comment describes both the allegations in the complaint and the terms of the consent order--embodied in the consent agreement--that would settle these allegations.

The Complaint Allegations

According to the Commission's Complaint, Individual Respondents Dennis Gay, Daniel Mowrey (also doing business as American Phytotheraphy Research Laboratory), and Mitchell K. Friedlander all worked from the same Salt Lake City, Utah facility as Corporate Respondents Basic Research, L.L.C., A.G. Waterhouse, L.L.C., Klein-Becker usa, L.L.C., Nutrasport, L.L.C., Sovage Dermalogic
Laboratories, L.L.C., and BAN, L.L.C., who have operated as a common enterprise to advertise and sell a broad line of topical gels and dietary supplements.

The Commission's Complaint alleges that these Respondents engaged in deceptive practices in advertising and selling topical fat-loss gels. Specifically, the Commission's Complaint challenges the following claims as unsubstantiated: That Leptoprin and Anorex cause weight loss of more than 20 pounds in significantly overweight users and that those products cause loss of substantial, excess fat in significantly overweight users.

Additionally, the Complaint challenges the following claims as false: That clinical testing proves that Leptoprin causes weight
loss of more than 20 pounds, including as much as 50, 60, or 147 pounds, in significantly overweight users; and that clinical testing
proves that Leptoprin causes loss of substantial, excess fat in significantly overweight users;

That Respondent Mowrey is a medical doctor.

The Proposed Consent Order

The proposed consent order contains provisions designed to prevent Respondents from continuing the illegal conduct alleged in the Complaint, and from engaging in future practices similar to those previously alleged.

Paragraph V provides that Basic Research will pay the sum of three million dollars ($3,000,000), on behalf of all Respondents, to the Commission. In the discretion of the Commission, these funds may be used to provide redress to purchasers of any of the products challenged in the Complaint and to pay the attendant administrative costs. If the Commission determines, in its sole discretion, that redress to product purchasers is wholly or partially impracticable or is otherwise unwarranted, any funds not used will be paid to the U.S. Treasury.

The proposed order allows Respondents to engage in various forms of legitimate conduct. The order does not prohibit Respondents from making any claim for any drug that is permitted in labeling for that drug under any tentative final or final standard established by the Food and Drug Administration (``FDA'').

By direction of the Commission.
Donald S. Clark,
[FR Doc. E6-7533 Filed 5-17-06; 8:45 am]

So if you want to lose weight fast. Stop eating. Learn control. Diet. Exercise. Get a gastric bypass like I did. The bottom line is that there is NO diet drug that will burn off fat. It takes self-control. It takes a change in lifestyle. If you’re significantly overweight…I feel your pain. I used to be 459 pounds. Now I’m 218. It took radical surgery to do that. I had to change my lifestyle or die. I tried the fads to no avail.

This blog is publish by Peter D. Sawyer, Peter Sawyer, Pete Sawyer, Pete, Sawyer, AKA Petey, Petey-Petey, Turdsi, Hump, Dude, bro, brah, kimosabee, a—hole, skinny, fatty, ugly, geek, loser, bozo, fatso, stupid, blockhead, dimwit, dodo, dolt, dullard, dumb bunny, dumb cluck, dumb head, dumbbell, dumbo, dumdum, dunce, fool, idiot, ignoramus, moron, numskull, oaf, simpleton, dumb, gay, queer, freak, dummy, fool, half-wit; imbecile; dolt, dunce, numskull, DBA actor, beggar, bum, bummer, castaway, dawdler, delinquent, drifter, floater, good-for-nothing, grifter, hobo, leper, loafer, lounger, ne'er-do-well*, outcast, pariah, remittance man, renegade, scumbag, skid-row bum, slimeball, stiff, stumblebum*, tramp, untouchable, vag, vagabond, vagrant, wastrel.

Clinical studies may not lie, but ads do.

Sunday, February 25, 2007

The Ultimate Reality Show

Are you sick of the staged red carpet interviews and photo opportunities. Everyone is so darn rehearsed and contrived. "What are you wearing this evening?" "Oh just Versace, but it's beautiful though isn't it?" I mean, what else has Joan River’s really done in the last 25 years…oh yeah, that’s right, she gave her daughter a vehicle to create her own “celebrity status.” What a world we live in.

Someone should make a new reality TV show...yes ANOTHER one. Hell, Survivor has done well, hasn’t it? This one would be fun though. Call it "Gotta Get Ready For My Oscar Appearance".

We could follow some celebs around the week before while they are getting their laser resurfacing, botox, breast implants, butt lifts, tattooed eyebrows and while lips are being filled with collagen, speaking becomes the REAL challenge. Let us see some of those size 12 ladies vomiting up as much as they can and putting themselves under a military fitness regime so they can fit in that size 5 dress.

One thing that always blows my mind about the Oscars and all these other awards shows is the fact that they felt obligated to give away gift bags to the stars who showed up - often worth hundreds of thousands of dollars. This bugged me for two main reasons:

The obvious fact that these are actors and actresses usually make more money than God, and that these “tokens of our appreciation” are worth three or four times as much as the average salary of an American. Think about how many schools Oprah could open in Africa?

I'd love to see each and every winner, right after they got off the stage and completed the tour of the Press Rooms, pop a button or two on that $50,000 dress or rented $75 tuxedo and actually look comfortable. Then show us what they really do at these after-parties. Eat appetizers from Costco and drink so much Jose Cuervo that they end up saying, "Stick this trophy where the sun don’t shine" to the nominees who didn’t win and then precede to get fall down drunk and make sure they tell everybody around that they won an Oscar. Then let’s see them get in the limo and take a nice drive out to Betty Ford to dry out!

Now here’s a group that’s got it down. Nickelodeon's Kids' Choice Awards is one of the funniest awards shows I’ve ever worked on. They have a burping contest and unsuspecting celebs getting drenched in green slime. Now this would be a great addition to the Oscar’s this year. Let’s have a little fun at these overpaid celebrities expense.

That's what it's all about. Maybe they should call it Survivor: Hollywood, the last celebrity to survive the week wins the Oscar. Do we really care? No.

Enjoy the show!

Saturday, February 24, 2007

Internet Hype & Myths:
Don't Play It Forward

I love the Internet. It puts a world-class library at our fingertips and makes mass communication easy and inexpensive. I'm able to post this Blog (did you know it means "Weblog") utilizing no envelopes, no postage, no mailboxes. It's amazing!

But all good things can be put to bad use. I get about 150 pieces of e-mail a day. 90% of it is garbage. Do I need bigger breasts? Sure. Do I need a bigger erection? Nope. Do I need Hoodia? What the hell is that stuff?

And then there are e-mails I get like this which has been circulating the Internet since November 1997, from the office of the chief executive of Microsoft Corporation.
Hello Everyone,

And thank you for signing up for my Beta Email Tracking Application or (BETA)
for short. My name is Bill Gates. Here at Microsoft we have just compiled an
e-mail tracing program that tracks everyone to whom this message is forwarded
to. It does this through an unique IP (Internet Protocol) address log book

We are experimenting with this and need your help. Forward this
to everyone you know and if it reaches 1000 people everyone
on the list you will receive $1000 and a copy of Windows98 at my expense.

Note: Duplicate entries will not be counted. You will be notified by email
with further instructions once this email has reached 1000 people. Vista
will not be shipped unitl it has been released to the general public.

Your friend,
Bill Gates & The Microsoft Development Team.
After a little investigation on some urban-legend websites, I discovered the allegations, though widely circulated, were based on false rumors. If you get junk mail like this, go to a website like this one - Internet Legends & Hoaxes Revealed and check them out.

And then there are e-mails like this, which you think come from PayPal because they have you e-mail address and even use the Paypal logo...

PayPal Account® Posible Fraud - Notification Security check ! You have received this email because your account has been used from different locations by you or someone else. For security purpose, we are required to open an investigation into this matter. In order to safeguard your account, we require that you confirm your banking details. To help speed up this process, please access the following link so we cancomplete the verification of your PayPal Account: Alert code: 1366968850 (Link Removed)

Please Note: If we do no receive the appropriate account verification within 48 hours, then we will assume this PayPal Bank account is fraudulent and will be suspended. The purpose of this verification is to ensure that your bank account has not been fraudulently used and to combat the fraud from our community.

We appreciate your support and understanding and thank you for your prompt attention to this matter. Regards, PayPal - Paypal Account® Security Department

Because we can't check out everything we read and hear, we have to evaluate the credibility of the information. One way is to consider what you know about the accuracy and integrity of the source. That's tough enough even when we know the identity of the source. When I get an e-mail like that from PayPal, I forward it to them (Send it to Here is the official PayPal response to this type of e-mail after I forwarded it to them.....

Thank you for taking the time to contact The email you reported was not sent by PayPal and is a phishing (fraudulent) email.

And here is their policy on e-mails like this...

Remember, PayPal will never ask you for your password in an e-mail. There are no exceptions to this policy. If someone claiming to be from PayPal asks you for your password in response to an e-mail, you should refuse to provide it and contact us. To contact PayPal, go to the PayPal Help Center and click the "Contact Us" link.

But with unsourced, unverified claims passed around on the Internet, we need to be very, very cautious. Regardless of the motives of the originator of these sorts of charges, most people who respond to these messages or forward such messages to others not only believe the information is true, they believe they are performing a civic duty. But good intentions are not enough.

In efforts to prevent and correct wrongs, we must be sure not to commit wrongs. We should handle this internet crap as if we were handling a loaded gun. If we don't have the time to check it out, we shouldn't take the time to repeat it.

My advice: Don't pass it on.

Friday, February 23, 2007

Finally! A Judge With A Conscience

To me, yesterday was the first time I've actually seen a judge who gave a crap. And now he's being criticized for it. I guess being "human" is not how we are supposed to act.

Yesterday, Judge Larry Seidlin decided that a court-appointed lawyer acting as the guardian for Anna Nicole Smith's baby, Dannielynn, will be given custody of the model's body.

I think that was the right move.

Shortly after the hearing, Smith's mother, ex-boyfriend and companion announced they will put aside their differences and work with attorney Richard Milstein to plan her burial in the Bahamas. "Everyone is to work equally and together and all the parties are in agreement that Anna deserves the best and the privacy the she sought," said Debra Opri, an attorney for Larry Birkhead, Smith's ex-boyfriend.

What the hell has all this legal mumbo jumbo been about anyway? Has it been about the best interests of her little baby? Hell no! But that is what it should have been all along. And finally there is a judge who show real human emotion and he is being criticized for it. What he did in this case was right and that's final!

Just because the guys said some offbeat remarks and showed a tear or two, the media is attacking him. Come on people, it's time to look at situations such as this and put the human factor into play. Anna died a couple of weeks ago. Her body is lying in a morgue decomposing. There hasn't even been a funeral. People are fighting over where to bury her and the future of her estate. Come on, what about her newborn child? I think this judge showed incredible human emotion and put aside all of the "traditional" legalese and did what's best for all involved.

Is it wrong for a man to cry? I don't think so. In fact, I think your more of a man if you can do it without hesitation. I'm not saying to do it if you drop your pen on the floor, but hey, in a situation such as this - where the life and future of a newborn child is concerned - this judge did nothing wrong. Get off his least he was real!

It blows me away how much this has become a media event. It is a personal family tradgedy. When my Dad died last fall, I wouldn't have wanted to go through the crap that has been happening with Anna's death. I mean come on, putting her will on the web. Yes, that's right. Her will is on the web. You can read it here! To me, a will is a personal family matter, not a piece of entertainment for people who can't get enough.

I hope that other judeges in our legal system would look at what this one judge did and put some human emotion into their cases. Throw out all the BS and the legal mumbo jumbo. Put the best interests of those involved in the forefront of your decisions.

Maybe then, the world will be a much better place.

Thursday, February 22, 2007

The Tree That Fell In The Forest...And No One Knew!

I was listening to the radio the other day (KNX - Los Angeles) and was shocked to hear this story about a guy named Vincenzo 'Vinnie' Ricardo from Hampton Bay, NY. Hampton Bays is a small hamlet of 12,200 people on the eastern end of Long Island, a fairly wealthy "well to do" community.

Vinnie was the proverbial tree that fell in the forest...and no one knew.

From what police in Hampton Bays, N.Y., can determine, the 70-year-old was sitting alone watching TV in his two-story home when he died.

That was more than a year ago, and when workers were summoned to his house last week after a report that freezing temperatures had caused the home's pipes to burst, they found Vinnies's mummified body still sitting on the couch, the TV still on.

A neighbor of Ricardo's, Deanna Devon, was shocked that no one discovered him sooner. "He was blind and he used to wander into the street. I used to worry he would get hit. Vinnie had people who came to help take care of him, so I don't understand this." Vinnie was often seen walking in the streets with his cane and had been stricken blind in his 50's and suffered from diabetes.

He apparently died of natural causes, according to Dr. Stuart Dawson, Suffolk County deputy chief medical examiner. Due to the dry air in his house, Ricardo's body was well-preserved, leaving his features and hair intact. "You could see his face. He still had hair on his head," morgue assistant Jeff Bacchus told Newsday. "I've been on the job 35 years, and I've never seen anyone dead that long."

"Vinnie had people who came to help take care of him, so I don't understand this," Devon said.

According to news reports, Vinnie was widowed years ago and had lived alone since then. The house was set in the woods far back from the road, according to neighbors, which made it difficult to observe Ricardo's actions.

"He hasn't been heard from in over a year. That's the part that baffles me," Dawson said. "Nobody sounded the alarm. We heard he had family somewhere nearby, but he was estranged from them," Devon added.

Neighbor April Cowden told the paper that she used to help Ricardo by reading his mail to him, paying his bills and buying his groceries. But in the summer of 2005, he began to demand more of her time, and when she couldn't comply, they had a falling out. "I needed to go to work one day and he wanted me to stay."

About a month later, Cowden said, she saw an ambulance at his house. Later, when she saw the mail begin to pile up, Cowden thought he was in the hospital.

Authorities are still at a loss as to how the electricity remained on in Ricardo's home all this time. "Something just seems really strange about all this. There are so many little things that don't make sense," Devon said.

This story blows my mind. Are we that selfish and self-centered that we can't take the time to pick up the phone and call somebody just to find out how they are doing? How about just a quick knock-on-the-door to say "Hi" when you're out walking you dogs? Many people, especially older people, are just "dying" to know that somebody cares. And is it that hard for us to get our heads out of the sand and be that somebody. Hey, I'm guilty of it too but this story has kind of given me a push.

There is an old saying that goes, "An eye for an eye..." Maybe if we get off our butts and care more for our fellow human beings, this world would be a better place. I was surprised that people were shocked that Vinnie died and just sat there for a year. It wouldn't have taken much to just stop by and check on him. Where I grew up outside of Albany, New York, people actually do that. It's an amazing little town.

So the bottom line is this. Take a moment of of you busy life to say "Hi" to someone today. And then say "Hi" to somebody else tomorrow. Then maybe we won't be the one quoted in the newspaper saying, "I didn't really know him very well, but apparently nobody did."

Wednesday, February 21, 2007

Warning: This Article Not To Be Read While Drinking Coffee, But Smoking is OK

The tendency of Americans to sue companies has gone too far, encouraging absurd warning labels on products. A washing machine complete with a warning not to put anybody inside has been given an award for the "wackiest warning" by a US lobby group.

Some people say warning labels can play a role in protecting the public. An engine manufacturer which warned "Never use a lit match or open flame to check fuel level" won second prize. Warnings not to dry wet mobile phones in microwave ovens and not to iron lottery tickets tied for third place. Honorable mentions went to a phonebook which advised: "Please do not use this directory while operating a moving vehicle".

Check out this label on a TiVo remote control! It say's that "TiVo remotes may become confused with chew toys. Warranty does not cover damage from chewing or slobber." Okay, this one might not be real but hey, it was part of my research. (Ain't the internet a grand source for information!)

What the hell have we come to? Mindless litigation is causing our courts to have such a backlog of cases that the people who have ligitimate claims never get to go to trial. In some cases, these trials only got a few minutes over tens of days due to motions, evidence gathering, failure of witnesses to show up, etc.

Warning labels...well they've just gotten out of hand! I did a little research into some labels that were inspired by this "mindless litigation" and was surprised (as you will be too) to the amount of companies that have to warn people about stuff that should be common sense! I mean what's next? A toilet that warns you that if you leave it up (this warning is especially for men - women will not have this problem) and it falls that you may somehow get injured? (See Photo)

My exhaustive and extensive research also came up with a few other labels which have had to have been inspired by stupid people...I mean really stupid people! Check some of them out...

Warning on fireplace log:
Caution -- Risk of Fire.

A warning on a pair of shin guards manufactured for bicyclists:
Shin pads cannot protect any part of the body they do not cover.

On a string of Chinese made Christmas lights:
For indoor or outdoor use only.

On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
Instructions - open packet, eat nuts.

On Nytol Nighttime Sleep-Aid:
Warning: May cause drowsiness.

Can of self-defense pepper spray warns:
May irritate eyes.

Warning on a Conair Pro Style 1600 hair dryer:
Do not use in shower. Never use while sleeping.

Silly Putty package warning:
Not for use as earplugs.

On a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.

Baby stroller warning:
Remove child before folding.

Household iron warns:
Never iron clothes while they are being worn.

Cardboard car sun shield that keeps sun off the dashboards warns
Do not drive with sun shield in place

Toilet bowl cleaning brush warns:
Do not use orally.

Instructions for an electric thermometer:

Do not use orally after using rectally.

These labels, along with the minsless litigation that inspired them is driving me crazy. They can't eaven enbalm or bury Anna Nicole Smith or James Brown due to the fact that people are doing all this legal rangling bullsh-- to figure out where they should be buried. Like they's all about the money!

This crap had got to STOP! How can a company be liable for an airplane that was built 30 years ago and the wind fell off due to metal fatigue. That's what happened with Cessna and that's why they stopped making small aircraft. The laws have changed some and Cessna is back in business. At what point does "common sense" kick in?

My bottom line is this: STOP thinking about how you can sue for things that you should of had the common sense to know anyway. A part of living is using your ability to reason. And by the way, please don't sue me for the fact that this article made your mouse scrolling finger cramp. You CHOSE to read this...I didn't make you!

Tuesday, February 20, 2007

Big Brother Is Watching You!

When was the last time you got excited taking a pee?

Urinal cake technology has been pretty stagnant in recent years. However, apparently New Mexico has been pretty pissed (get it?) about how many of its citizens are drinking and driving. That’s where these new cutting-edge, state-of-the-art cakes come in. Even though most people know that by the time you think you hear your toilet talking to you, you’ve probably had enough to drink.

The Wizmark Interactive Urinal Communicator (Best. Name. Ever.), made by some company called Healthquest Technologies, is driving the point home. These people make urinal cakes that advertise everything from beer to condoms. Hey, if you're trying to get a guys attention (no pun intended) the best place to do it is when he's standing in a nice moth scented bathroom at some seedy establishment holding his life in his hands!

Well, New Mexico thinks that this technology can work for them. So, when you step up to that urinal, imagine your surprise when you hear this...“Hey there, big guy. Having a few drinks?” a female voice says a few seconds after an approaching male sets off a motion sensor in the device. “It’s time to call a cab or ask a sober friend for a ride home.” Want to hear this for yourself, Click Here!

Big Brother sure has gotten out of hand (or should I say, in it?).

Monday, February 19, 2007

A Concern For The REAL News

Have you watch the freakin' news lately. Are we really that stupid? Let's look at the top stories of the day and not in their order of importance. People die - that's a fact. People get their hair cut. That's another fact. But it ticks me off what is deemed more important news let's look at the recent headlines!

Did you know Anna Nicole Smith is dead? Do you really care. And with all this in-fighting over who fathered the baby - is anybody concerned for the future of this child? Let's be real. She was a Playboy model...a celebrity. She made about as much difference to world peace as did Bill Clinton's White House antics. Any by the way, I think I'm putting my hat in the ring as the father of her child. Why not, it doesn't seem anybody really cares about the kid - just the money.

And Britney Spears. Now here is raw news. She got a haircut. Big dang deal. I get a haircut because my wife tells me to or because Sammy (my hair stylist) calls me and tells me it's been a month. And after my haircut, I don't go out and get a tattoo. The fact that this chick (again, another celebrity) cut her hair off is her own business. Maybe she had lice? Maybe she's trying to look like G. Gordon Liddy. I really don't care and I don't think you should either.

The Iraq War. Now here's news. Thousands of our soldiers have died over there. They are fighting battles that most of us could care less about. Sure, President Bush made some mistakes by sending them over there, but now that they are there, let's give them the support they need to get the job done. I don't want to see any more of these kids die either. Now what is going on in Iraq is definitely news. Those soldiers get haircuts and they don't get their pictures on every major media outlet in the world. These soldier die, and we don't post their pictures all over the world either. But Anna and Britney, now when they do this crap it's news - when a soldier does the same thing, it's page 89, column B, 4 lines. Thank God for a few of the major news outlets that do tributes to the REAL soldiers - my hat's off to them.

Okay, this rant's gone on long enough. I am appalled by a statistic I heard the other day that Anna Nicole's death got 813% more press coverage than the war in Iraq. Come on folks, new is news. Celebrity antics is entertainment. Let's put a distinct separation between the two and maybe this world will be a better place. Or at least we'll be more well informed!

Sunday, February 18, 2007

I Just Got A Parking Space At MySpace!

Check my space on MySpace. I hope you like it. I don't spend much time there. I have a life. Oh, by the way, I'm not sure but I think I'm one of the 2,687,345 people who may have fathered Anna Nicole Smith's baby. I'm not sure though cause I've never seen her, never really cared about her but heck, she's got money and I figure if I can stake a claim...well.

By the way, just because your tattoo has Chinese characters in it doesn't make you spiritual. It's right above the crack of your ass. And it translates to "beef with broccoli." The last time you did anything spiritual, you were praying to God you weren't pregnant. You're not spiritual. You're just high.

A couple of other things...

Stop giving me that pop-up ad for classmates.Com! There's a reason I don't talk to people for 25 years. Because I don't particularly like them! Besides, I already know what the captain of the football team is doing these days . . . Mowing my lawn.

Here's a fact about life: Saying that teenage boys who have sex with their hot, blonde teachers are permanently damaged. I have a better description for these kids: lucky bastards.

And for you ladies, leave your eyebrows alone. Here's how much men care about your eyebrows: do you have two of them? Okay, we're done.

And lastly...there's no such thing as flavored water. There's a whole aisle of this crap at the supermarket, water, but without that watery taste. Sorry, but flavored water is called a soft drink. You want flavored water? Pour some vodka over ice and let it melt. That's your flavored water.

Have you had enough of me. Then check out my new MySpace!

Okay, Later!